Cherophobia

Cherry1

No, it’s not the fear of cherries, but the fear of happiness.

I think I might be suffering from this a little bit.

After coming out, feeling ready, willing and able and tumbling, I realized that there is a deep-rooted uneasiness within me when it comes to potential pleasure or happiness.

I think I know exactly where it comes from.

Whenever I experienced great happiness in the past, it always seemed to be followed by great despair.  So I have developed this strange belief that in order to avoid heartbreak, I must avoid being happy.

The result is depression.  A self-inflicted condition due to a state of mind.

I am just becoming aware of this now.  It’s quite disturbing.  I’m not sure what to do.

Whenever I realize something, I write it down.  This is how I give it a form and shape.  I find it easier to tackle after it becomes visible, observable and describable.

Cherophobia:  aversion to happiness.  There is some of it within me.

I’m sure the universe will take care of it.  If this is something that should be kicked out of my belief system, then let the butt-kicker step forward.  I welcome him.  Or her…

Ding Dong

Ding Dong 3

Who am I?
You’re my Ding Dong

Who are you?
I’m your King Kong

What should we do?
Bing, bang, bong

What should we not do?
Play ping pong

Where should we move?
To Hong Kong

What if we succeed?
I’ll sing song

What if we fail?
I’ll hit the gong gong

How do I deceive you?
When you’re hung hung

How do I please you?
When you’re long long

Where should I rest?
On my tongue tongue

Why don’t you marry me?
Because the ring’s wrong

Why can’t I leave you?
Cause you’re my Ding Dong