The Door

door

Fortunately, I found this door.  And I opened it.  There was a whole world on the other side of that door!  Who would have thought?

Immediately, I saw him.  Noticing that I had opened the door, he turned around and radiated somehow as he prepared to greet me.  But he didn’t even move, his smile just sucked me right in, and the door shut closed behind me.

So there I was, standing and facing him.  Actually I was sitting, as if dreaming, moving as thoughts move, freely.  He was sitting in the armchair a few feet across from me.

“Who are you?” I asked.  I think this was the first thing I said.

His reply surprised me:  “I am an outsider.”

I froze.  No, I stopped.  Time stopped!

I looked around and realized I was not in my usual element.  I was at home, I recognized the house, the living room, the furniture.  I was definitely in my home, sitting on the sofa but something was strange.

I was in the presence of this “outsider” and suddenly I realized that I was outside of myself.  Outside of myself?  How could I be outside of myself?  And time had stopped!  What the hell was going on?

The medication, I thought.  I took my pills this morning, as usual.  Same dose I have been taking for months.  Maybe it’s the pills?  Maybe I’m hallucinating.

“Daemon, look at me!” the outsider said.

Holy crap, I’m hearing voices too.  What’s happening to me?  Maybe I’m schizophrenic!

“Daemon, relax.  There’s nothing wrong with you.  You are seeing and hearing clearly.”  He said.

I remembered the door.  Where was it?  The door had disappeared.  I had stepped out of reality.  Where was I?  Who was he?  A thousand questions ran through my mind.  I looked at the man and he looked back at me, straight at me, directly into me, he could see through me!

I don’t know how he did it but he touched me deeply.  He put his attention on my core, and I felt peace, warmth and security.  God, it felt good!

Then I understood.  The situation became so evident and simple, yet mindboggling.  I was he and he was me!  The real me, next to me, loving me, eternally.

I had finally found it, the truth!  My treasure, my fortune, my destiny!  I was so happy!

Then he came closer and something very weird happened at that moment.  I’m not sure how to describe it but, the outsider became an insider.  As if his body was fluid or misty, he slithered inside of me, merging his chakras with mine and it was…

Pure, wholesome, energizing ecstasy!

Wishful Thinker

caterpillar

I long for a stranger
My heart wants a flyer
One my size, one like me
The finer the better

Who could it be
Hero or fairy
He’s hiding from me
My eyes just can’t see

His phantom makes sure
That forever I look
Ahead and within me
Not in any great book

He draws me nearer
Inside his manor
Do I have a choice
When I hear his voice

He’s very tricky
And very strange too
I’m sure there must be
A reason or two

He shows me where to go
So I never get lost
Pulls me with his lasso
Weird kind of Pentecost

I’m sure he’s what I shall become
I’m attracted to my future
I wonder if you think it’s dumb
To be drawn to my true nature

I want to take him
I want to kiss him
I want to eat him
Infuse into him

I think that if I do that
My body will transform
I will no longer be flat
Mistaken for a worm

Pleasuring myself and you
Unafraid of the mirror
Maybe even turn into
My own secret admirer

Not to envy my body
Simply fluttering proudly
Stimulating the others
Implying that it matters

Understand what is mine
Meant to glow and to shine
Can’t believe that it’s greed
To find one’s own star seed

This seed is my core
Pushes me forward
I just can’t ignore
Love that is inward

Honor it, hug it
Give it importance
And presidency
Spirit is the key

But why is it like this
It hurts to not be ready
I’m not yet the reflection
Of the one I wish to be

The mirror is a liar
It shows the exterior
The bumps, the pits, the scars
An aging caterpillar

But this is not me
It’s just a fur top
It’s like an eggshell
A shield I must drop

Oh I can’t wait to get out
Geez I can’t wait to break free
Can’t stop dreaming of those wings
How beautiful they will be