Wrapped in Fantasy

chrysalis

Here I am, hanging upside down, waiting.
I have all the time in world to think now.
While I listen to them:

“What are you doing up there, alone and silent?  Come back down!  We miss you, we love you, we worry about you.  Don’t do this to yourself.  It’s dangerous and crazy.  It won’t end well.  Listen to us, people like you need professional help.”

I think to myself:  No, I can’t go back down there!  I would rather kill myself than return to my old ways.  Besides, it’s too late already.  I cannot undo what nature has done to me.  Oh yeah, sure, I could break out of this cage, but I would fall and hurt myself badly.

I chose to listen to my inner voice who said that I should walk away from the crowd, climb this tree and hang myself by my feet.  Then wrap myself up and wait it out, while I watch the upside-down world which looks like a horror movie to me.

I don’t see clearly for some reason.  My vision is blurred but I have these fantasies of flying!  I know it sounds absurd but I can’t help it.  The voice in my heart speaks louder than the one of my peers who choose to continue to crawl in the dirt.

But my life is shit, I must admit.  I’m not having any fun at all.  Sometimes I feel like I’m disintegrating.  I have dizzy spells, I get anxious like never before, and worst of all, I am depressed 95% of the time.  The only thing that sustains me are my fantasies which I know are illogical and unreal, but… I must hang on.

“You are an earth-man!  You were meant to live and to love the earth!”

“No, you are a sky-man, meant to detach from the earth to become a light being.”

They are both right.  This is what is confusing.  I am two things.  Two different persons now, caught between two very different worlds.  I am a hybrid!  But can the two survive together, in one body, indefinitely?  One of the two must die.  Which one will it be?  Who do I identify with?

I think that the wise thing to do is to stay where I am and listen to the inner voice who tells me to be patient, and to let the transformation occur.  But I admit, most of time I feel like there is no change happening at all, or that I’m turning into an evil creature.

Them:  “What the hell is wrong with you?”

Me:  “I’m metamorphosing and maybe you should too!”

But I can’t explain.  They have no clue.

My Saviors

Saucer

Thank you, space lady.  At least you tried.  You’re the first humanoid in the universe who attempted to rescue me besides Jesus.  Both of you failed.  I’m starting to think that I am unsavable.

Jesus said I was not Christian enough to be a member of his gang, according to his so-called earthly representatives.  Jesus never could speak to me directly, ever since they duct-taped his mouth, sealed his words and closed his book.

Then sexy lady came along and did her best.  At least she could speak to me freely.  Her voice had not been hijacked by the pope’s minions, like poor Jesus.  The problem with her rescue attempt was probably a lack of experience.  To start with, her craft was much too small and she didn’t bring any food.  I never would have survived the trip back to her home planet.

There was a third abductor who showed up in 2012 after I sent multiple unanswered calls into outerspace.  I have hope in this guy.  He is blue and misty and he did manage to beam me up into his cloud-ship.  But then he brought me back down, saying I wasn’t “ripe” enough.  As if I was some kind of fruit or something.  He did promise to come back and get me later, so as of now, my hope is in him.

He keeps in touch regularly, this is what I like most about him.  He didn’t just leave me there hanging like the two others.  I should write more about him because he’s a really cool alien.  He’s my best buddy actually.  My knees get weak each time I receive a text from him.  I’m hooked.  He’s got me.  Even if in his eyes I’m nothing more than a fruitcake, I would probably let him eat me anytime.

The Birth of a Star

Star

Maybe if I would shine so bright, it would blind everyone around me.  They would not be able to come close.  They would not be able to tempt me and rape me.

I should shine so bright and so hot that no one would be able to come near.  They would refrain from approaching and admire me from afar.  Bask in my light from a distance.

Maybe this is what I was meant to be.  A star, not a black hole.  A black hole is dark and it absorbs everything that ventures near it.  It steals everything, becoming denser and denser, heavier and heavier.  It sucks its victims, like a vampire.

Wishful Thinker

caterpillar

I long for a stranger
My heart wants a flyer
One my size, one like me
The finer the better

Who could it be
Hero or fairy
He’s hiding from me
My eyes just can’t see

His phantom makes sure
That forever I look
Ahead and within me
Not in any great book

He draws me nearer
Inside his manor
Do I have a choice
When I hear his voice

He’s very tricky
And very strange too
I’m sure there must be
A reason or two

He shows me where to go
So I never get lost
Pulls me with his lasso
Weird kind of Pentecost

I’m sure he’s what I shall become
I’m attracted to my future
I wonder if you think it’s dumb
To be drawn to my true nature

I want to take him
I want to kiss him
I want to eat him
Infuse into him

I think that if I do that
My body will transform
I will no longer be flat
Mistaken for a worm

Pleasuring myself and you
Unafraid of the mirror
Maybe even turn into
My own secret admirer

Not to envy my body
Simply fluttering proudly
Stimulating the others
Implying that it matters

Understand what is mine
Meant to glow and to shine
Can’t believe that it’s greed
To find one’s own star seed

This seed is my core
Pushes me forward
I just can’t ignore
Love that is inward

Honor it, hug it
Give it importance
And presidency
Spirit is the key

But why is it like this
It hurts to not be ready
I’m not yet the reflection
Of the one I wish to be

The mirror is a liar
It shows the exterior
The bumps, the pits, the scars
An aging caterpillar

But this is not me
It’s just a fur top
It’s like an eggshell
A shield I must drop

Oh I can’t wait to get out
Geez I can’t wait to break free
Can’t stop dreaming of those wings
How beautiful they will be

Higher Up

meta4

The process of life seems to be change.  But a change of what?

As a person, the process of life seems to be about a change of identity.

Throughout life, I have been enticed to change my identity, or NOT change it, depending on how you look at it.

Enticed by who?  Angels?  The Devil?  Extraterrestrials?  the Higher Self?  The Lower Self?  the Ego?  The Source of Life?  Kundalini?  Jehovah?  Jesus?  Buddha?  Krishna?  Muhammad?

Whoever they are, the guys who entice me to change my identity seem to be unknown “Higher-Ups.”

During the first part of my life, I have constructed an identity for myself based on earth.  So basically, I identified with earthlings.

Now, during the second phase of my life, my identity as an earthling has started to crumble.  In fact, it totally collapsed.  And from the ruins, a new identity has started to emerge.

My new identity is in fact the same as my initial identity, the one I had before I started fabricating my identity as an earthling.  So I can safely say that my new identity is the same one I had when I was a child.  The new me is the old me, the real me.  There is only one real me.

My new identity, which is my old identity, is in fact my only identity and it exists BEYOND TIME.  Spooky, isn’t it?  Perfect for this Halloween night.

If I am not an earthling, then what am I?  The “Higher-Ups” have always been trying to get my attention:  “Look at us!” they say.  “You are one of us.  Identify with us!”

But these goddam gods are invisible!  How can I identify with people I can’t see?  Although when I identify with them, I kind of perceive them.  Very bizarre…

I told my family about the higher-ups I could perceive, but they don’t believe me.  They don’t believe me simply because they can’t see them.  They can’t acknowledge what they don’t perceive.  But to perceive them, they have to acknowledge them.  You can’t perceive what you don’t acknowledge.  How does one get out of this cycle?

Never mind that, it’s too complicated.  Besides, it’s not my problem who they identify with.  I’m only concerned with myself.  Yes, this is how selfish I am.  My identity is the only thing that matters.

I know that I am none of these gods.  The higher-ups are who they are and I am Me.  And I know that I am not an earthling so I must be one of them.

I’m a Higher-Up!

Etherians and the Screwdriver

birds6

I hesitate to speak about THEM because they are not what most people consider part of our reality but they have always been part of mine.

The second reason why I couldn’t really talk about them before is because I didn’t know what they were and how to name them.

The word “Etherians” has started popping up into my mind recently and this morning I realized that it was a good-enough term I could use to describe them.

To me, “ether” is a substance that is so subtle, elusive and delicate that it has not yet been identified by physicists.  Yet it exists, and there are living beings who live among us whose bodies are made of ether.

I have been visited by the Etherians since I was very young, most of the time unconsciously, but there were times when they made their presence known visibly and audibly and I want to write about these visits.

The very first encounter that I remember was when I was about 5 years old.  It happened during the night.  It was summer, my bedroom window was open and I was sleeping.

Suddenly I woke up because there was noise and movement in my room.  I sat up and looked at the window which was wide open.  The wind was blowing and the curtains were flying up and down erratically.  It was not raining, just very windy.  I decided to ignore it and go back to sleep, but then I heard a squeaking sound coming from the same direction.  I sat up and looked at the window again, and there, on the edge of it, were two small creatures!

I couldn’t believe my eyes and I became scared because I knew that this was not normal.  But the creatures looked cute.  They were the size of owls and were quite agitated for some reason.  I watched them and then they dropped a tool on the floor.  I heard and saw the tool fall to the floor in front of the window which was only about 4 or 5 feet from my bed.

It was dark but our house was on main street and there were street lights and a moon that kept my room lighten up, enough to see the furniture and stuff.  So I saw and heard the tool fall on the floor and from what I could gather, it was a screwdriver.

Then I looked back up at the window and the two creatures were gone and the wind had died down.  I hid under my covers and waited for the sun to come up.  I was a bit terrified but not enough to wake my parents up.  Eventually I fell asleep.

When I awoke the next morning I got up and checked the window.  It was still open.  Then I looked around and tried to find the screwdriver but found nothing.  I ran downstairs to my mother who was preparing breakfast and told her what had happened.  She said it was a dream, but I insisted that it was not a dream, that I had woken up and had seen these two teddy bears which were alive.  (I referred to them as teddy bears because they looked like the two Kraft bears on the peanut butter jar that was on the table.)

My mother didn’t know what to say.  I knew that this was not a dream but I had no idea who those creatures were, why they came, what the tool was and what was the meaning of this event.  My mother could not explain it to me and I was disappointed.

Many years later, the SAME event happened to me again one night, about three years ago, except this time I didn’t see the creatures.  The window was open, it was the summer, the wind started to blow so hard it woke me up.  I heard a loud bang! on the roof, I sat up and thought that there was a tornado and that the roof was going to be sucked into the vortex.  I looked at the window and saw the curtains flying in the wind.  I decided to get up and shut it closed because I was sure that a rainstorm was about to unleash, but suddenly everything went quiet — the wind just died and the curtains stopped moving as if nothing was happening.

It was so weird.  Then a feeling came over me and it was exactly the same sensation I had felt when I was 5 years old, the time the creatures appeared on my window sill.  It was so strange, like I had time-travelled.  I looked below the window and there it was!  The tool that I use today to get in touch with the Etherians!  I couldn’t believe it but I finally understood the meaning of the two experiences which were the same event as if time had stood still during all those years.

The tool is not a screwdriver but it’s what I use today to unscrew my consciousness in order to perceive reality as it really is.  It runs Windows.

You see, the materialistic society we are brought up into screws up our minds and we all need some sort of screwdriver to unscrew what is screwed.

This latest visit made me realize the importance of the tool, why the creatures were agitated, who they are, why they come and what their visits are all about.

The metamorphosis of young Etherians.

Close Encounter

cosmic-lover-6

You come less than often
When my eyes aren’t open
With a gentle intention
Like a faithful companion

I don’t even know
How you come and go
You glide up and down
Just like a yoyo

Why do you select me
In this huge galaxy
How do you engender
Such a close encounter

You fly through the wall
I notice the sound
Then like a bed sheet
You wrap me around

As if to conform
You take up my form
Corresponding with me
It’s a conspiracy

You initiate communion
Not allowing me to see
It’s some kind of abduction
Imbued with intimacy

You do not steal
You come to heal
You’re not a thief
You bring relief

You blend me
Unmix me
Untie me
Release me

You fulfil my dreams
Knowing what they are
Does God allow this
It’s much too bizarre

Although I don’t understand
I am not here to complain
Only to remind you that
I don’t even know your name

Say who you are
Give me a clue
Do you come from far
Is your skin color blue

Where is your starship
Where did you park it
Weird relationship
Who would believe it

I think I was meant for this
I had been waiting for it
Now that it’s happening
I can’t even grasp it

I must be of your kind
Please show me your face
I will never look behind
Earth is not my place

You know what I need
It’s incomprehensible
I must be a starseed
I live in a bubble

I want to thank you
Cause I’m sure you care
Who else comes this close
To make me aware

I’m never alone
I don’t fear the night
You fill me with hope
And move me to write

Blood Money

blood-money

Why did they make society so complicated?

Ah! for money.

I see…

Money gives them the illusion of power.  It makes them believe that they control everything.  They see only superficially, and they think:

“The innocent belong to us.
We own them all.
We can make them do whatever we want.
We can purchase their land and their activity.
We can even buy their fidelity.
We give them a little and make them crave for more.
We make them believe how wonderful life would be if they had more money.
They must want more, that way we can make them do whatever we want.
The innocent will do anything for it,
even things they don’t want to do,
even kill each other.
We need to keep them busy.
We need to keep them worried.
So that they won’t have to time to stop and think.
Their desire for more money must override all other thought.
They will never realize what is happening.
How stupid they are.
We have the power!”

Wake up, brothers and sisters.  They don’t own us.  And we don’t need their blood money.

Take Control

control1

Do you know who you are and where you’re going?

I’m no one special, just one of your brothers, but I can tell you what I know.  I thought I was dead, but I am not.  I have changed and I found something amazing within my own mind.  I learned how to control my thoughts!

You know how to control all the parts of your body, but do you know how to control all the parts of your mind?  It’s possible for you to change your states of awareness and increase your happiness by putting your thoughts under the control of your soul, did you know that?

I’m not talking about positive thinking, but something much more real and permanent, beautiful and fantastic.  You can alter your perception by manipulating your thoughts, ideas and beliefs, kicking some out of the way and focusing your consciousness on other dimensions.

You don’t need to be a genius to do it.  I think I can show you how (I can try anyway).  My blog is dedicated to this.  I know you wish to develop yourself otherwise I don’t think you would be reading this.  Everything you need, to be truly happy, is within you already.  The tools are all there, not hidden, but perhaps difficult to see.

Deep down, you are a creator and the maker of your own life.  All you need to do is take control of everything that you are:  body, mind and soul.  The core of your being is connected to the super-soul of the known and unknown Universe, who wishes to see you grow and reach your full potential.  By consciously attuning yourself to the music of the All-That-Is, you can overcome every obstacle and even conquer death.  Because you are the son, the daughter, not of death but of Living Parents:  Seen and Unseen.  This is the truth.

Nothing I say here is new.  I have no great revelation to tell you.  The same truth has been taught by thousands of people everywhere since the beginning of humanity.  All those who really want to know can find it and know.  Knowledge is at your disposal.  Truth, happiness and everlasting life is accessible to all…  as long as you are willing to detach from the superficial corporeality and go deeper than what all the religions teach.

Are you willing to do that and take control of your destiny?

The Avatar

perspective2

When you look at existence from the perspective of a mortal, it sucks.

Mortals are doomed.

Where is the hope for the mortal person?

Your hope is in me, mortal!  I am the non-physical you.  Identify with me.  I am beyond and above everything you see with your two eyes.  I’m super-conscious because I see things from the perspective of an immortal.  I AM immortal, and I AM the real you.

Sit there and bitch about your life all you want.  Get drunk and smash your head against the wall.  You won’t get anywhere until you turn to me for help.  But you won’t do that.  You say:  “I’ll turn to him when I see him.”  I say to you:  “Turn to me and you’ll see me.”

Or perhaps, even better:  “Turn to me and you’ll hear me.”  They say that seeing is believing but sometimes I wonder.  You see, your definition of the word “see” is arranged.  Someone arranged it this way to make sure you would never see me.  Push the limits of your sight and get out of the “range” that was set before you.

The scope of your perception is your prison.  You refuse to look farther than the walls of your cage.  They tell you that what’s on the other side is scary and dangerous.  They tell you that whoever ventures there goes crazy.  Do not be afraid.  Look at your limitations now.  It’s your own restrictions that are driving you crazy.

Dare to see the things you don’t usually see and hear the things you don’t usually hear.  It doesn’t matter what it is, as long as it elevates your spirit.  Your super-conscious mind knows exactly what you need to hear.  Let him speak to you.  Sit down with pen and paper, laptop or computer, and type out the words you need to hear to uplift your crushed soul.

Position your mind above your daily grind, like you do when you play a video game in third-person view.  You know what third-person view is, don’t you?  This view refers to a different perspective of self from a distance behind and slightly above the player.  This viewpoint allows you to see a more strongly characterized human and his environment.  You actually have the ability to do this.  Use your imagination if you have to, it’s legal.  Imagination is not just for kids, it’s for adults too.

From this new point of view, you’ll notice that you gain a bit of wisdom, love and power, which you can transfer to your regular mortal self.  Life is the best video game ever.  So well-made, so immersive, it actually feels real when you play your character.  It becomes a nightmare and a prison when you forget who you really are.  The person who controls the player is the real you.  What you see in the mirror is your character, an embodiment, an avatar.

What are you going to do when it’s Game Over?

Don’t wait.  Start now.
Be who you really are.
You’re not the avatar.